Christians are straight up FREAKS
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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