i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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