Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
