Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
