As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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