I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
