And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.