like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
