i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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