Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
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