why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Randomize
