oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Randomize
