Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
