I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
