Midget sex pt 2 tonight
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
