Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
