Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
