Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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