We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
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Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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