We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
