We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
