watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.