In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
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At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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