So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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