THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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