i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
