But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize