Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
