i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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