he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
