even my farts smell like vagina
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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