I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
