ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I love you. Go after that dick
Randomize
