i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
