The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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