just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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