Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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