I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
