My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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