at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Randomize
