Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
