pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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