Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
