he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
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She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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