in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
