The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
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