my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
