What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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