Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
