bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
