So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize